Creating a Safe Place
I have been thinking about creating a safe place for people to speak their truth. Not all people have this luxury to be honest with those around them, or the courage to share their suppressed feelings. My questions will be in italics and the answers from my Inner Voice will be in normal print.
Many people are surrounded by others that are not interested in those that are expressing their feelings. This will prevent a person from being comfortable enough to speak their truth, or discuss a troubling emotional situation.
Creating a safe place for others, begins with accepting the love that is within you (all people). Then from this powerful place of center, those around you can begin to express their concerns to you and know that these concerns will not be use against them, and that their voice will be heard.
Do we hold onto our concerns because we do not trust those around us?
Trust is a big factor in being comfortable with speaking your truth. Even in long lasting relationships, there will be subjects that are never spoken or shared. Remember, speaking one’s truth can be a very fragile place, no matter how strong the relationship, or how close the friendship.
In a recent newspaper article, the author speaks of the crisis in masculinity, which discusses the isolation and loneliness that many young men are experiencing, among other topics. Does this fit into creating a safe place to speak what is on one’s mind?
Many people, do not have the relationships with those around them that would make them feel comfortable sharing the discomfort that is within them. Also, people have been taught: to keep their feelings to themselves, big boy’s don’t cry, or to suck it up. These phrases have done more harm than good to a vast segment of the human population.
When the pressure of “sucking it up” is too much to withstand, this person may explode in anger, rage, or violence. They believed that no one truly wanted to hear what was troubling them, and they internalized their struggle. The result is that they could no longer handle the internal stress.
This crisis in not only limited to the male population, many women, as well as men, struggle with finding a safe place to speak without the fear of retaliation. This creates tremendous stress within a person’s life.
How can we help those around us that are struggling with their inner conflict?
As we have said, being of true love is the foundation for any successful discussion that would help expose what a person is internalizing. Trust must be created and maintained before a person will speak their truth with those around them. Also, when a person knows that they are truly being heard, they will begin to open the door to sharing what is bothering them.
There are many distractions in the human experience these days. I can see that a person may feel they are not truly being heard, and that they may even feel ignored.
These distractions can take away from any relationship. If a person doubts that they are being heard because of a distraction, they will choose to stay silent in the future. Remember, there are two sides to every relationship, if a person believes that they are not being heard, there is a person on the other side of the conversation that may not be listening. The responsibility to create a safe place for people to express their deepest concerns falls on those that can do something to help those that are in need of comfort.
This responsibility would have to begin at the early stages of the relationship, wouldn’t it?
Yes it would, because it is much harder to create a safe space for someone to speak their truth if they feel that have been ignored over the years. Though time should not stop a person from attempting to creating space for those around them to speak openly, and without fear.
If a person has felt heard from the beginning of the relationship—this is, being heard without fear of retribution—they are more likely to speak their truth when their life turns difficult. The responsibility to create a safe space for those to speak with courage, truth and honesty, falls on every individual on the planet. This safe place will be created out of love, and this love will open the conversation for those in need of speaking their truth.
Do you have a safe place to speak what is on your mind? Or, have you created a safe place for those around you to speak their truth? This safe place must have a foundation of love for it to benefit those in need.
If you have any questions, comments or you would like to become part of my email list that receives a conversation with my Inner Voice each week, let me know. Email me at email@example.com
Peace and Well-Being, Paul
Copyright Paul Hudon 2019