I have been thinking about victimhood, how this level of consciousness drives our life, and if we can move past this powerful place of limitation. Victimhood is a strong word, but there is little explanation needed when we hear the word. 
With this in mind I thought a conversation with my Inner Voice would shed some clarity on this compelling subject. My questions will be in italics for clarity.


To live one’s truth is to sift through and question many of the beliefs that have created one's present reality. Through this course of action, those beliefs that hold one back—those that are not based in love—can be set free from one’s consciousness.

The role of victimhood in forging one’s life, is a powerful deterrent to living a life of joy and true happiness. Maintaining the identity of a victim is believing that it is the behavior of others that have caused their suffering. Though this may be true, the responsibility to escape victimhood falls squarely on the individual that is blaming others. Someone may have caused the pain once, but by reliving the incident, searching for answers, the pain continues to grow in strength. One must release this mindset before they can truly live a life of inner peace.

It appears that some people find strength in their belief that they are a victim. This then becomes part of their identity.

People that live this way are unaware that they can release the shackles of victimhood through the loving act of self-forgiveness. Why self-forgiveness? It may be too challenging to forgive those that caused the initial pain and suffering. Self-forgiveness is a powerful way to take back one’s own dignity and self-respect. This loving act comes from a desire to free oneself from the burden that one carries when they are hurt emotionally or physically by others. When a person accepts that self-forgiveness is the true path to moving forward, they will also begin to experience a life of self-love. 

People will ask, “Why do I have to forgive myself, I did nothing wrong?”

Imagine the emotional pain as a heavy weight that one has carried since the incident. This weight keeps them from experiencing life as it is meant to be. Every time the possibility of love appears in their life, the weight keeps them from reaching this love. The weight limits their emotional growth, and their ability to see life clearly. What few people realize is that they are carrying this weight all by themselves. The person that had caused the pain, may have long forgotten their negative actions. But the burden is still carried, each and every moment of the day. 

Self-Forgiveness is needed because the load can only be removed through an act of love. In this case one needs self-love before forgiveness will have any lasting affect. The desire to release the pressure of this weight, is a desire to discover one’s love for oneself. As you may know, no amount of victimhood will release one from this weight. The only clear path to a true resolution is through the loving act of self-forgiveness.

Please go own.

This loving act of self-forgiveness, does not release the person that caused the harm from their responsibility. The act of self-forgiveness is an act by a person that is beginning to take responsibility for their own life. Basically, they realize that they no longer need to carry this burden, and they forgive themselves for dong so. Remember, self-forgiveness is a desire to live a better life, through this powerful act of self-love.

The challenge becomes one of accepting the responsibility to love yourself. No other person can do this for you or anyone else. Only you can love yourself enough to take responsibility for the outcome of your life. Self-forgiveness is the key that will unlock the shackles of victimhood.

What about the person that caused the pain? It may be too hurtful to forgive them.

When a person has the strength, courage and trust in their self-love, they may be able to forgive the person that harmed them. If it is not a true act of forgiveness this may open many hidden wounds, and it could also cause a renewed emotional struggle within. To truly forgive someone that harmed you, is to release them from your consciousness. Imagine tossing their actions into the wind, where they will blow away from your awareness, causing new light and positive energy to flow into your being. To forgive them is to love yourself. You forgive because you want to release the victimhood mindset from your consciousness, and then move forward to a better more loving way of life.

If forgiving them is too challenging, then forgiving ourselves is the best course of action?

Yes, but remember, any act of true forgiveness, is an act that is rooted in love, a love for yourself,  a love that accepts yourself with kindness and compassion. Victimhood is allowing someone else to control your life from afar. Self-forgiveness is the loving act of taking control of your life, to be lived as you choose, without the weight, burden and suffering that victimhood has caused.

I can look back in my life and see times when I lived the belief of a victim. It can be a powerful place of despair. Through the act of self-forgiveness I have been able to move forward in a positive, loving direction.

Please let me know what you think. If you have any questions or comments, leave a comment below, or email me I’m always open to expanding the conversation.

Each week I send out an email conversation with my Inner Voice. This week we discuss perfectionism. Why do we live this way, and how does this way of life affect us? Email me at the above address and I’ll send you that conversation.

To read more of my conversations with my Inner Voice, check out my articles in New Spirit Journal, and Conscious Shift Magazine 

Thanks for taking the time to read this post.

Peace and Well-Being.


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