As I sat in the emergency room waiting for the orthopedic surgeon, I was searching for someone to blame. I surely didn’t want to take responsibility for crashing my motorcycle on that dirt trail. Although I was the person in charge of the throttle.
The deeper question would be, why was I seeking to place blame when my health and well-being were clearly my responsibility? Is it just me? Or do others seek to blame someone or something for their scars, whether they are emotional, or physical? Placing blame is an interesting thought-process. Yet, why do we behave this way?
With this subject in mind I’ll seek the guidance from my Inner Voice for a better understanding of placing blame. My questions will be in italics for clarity.
Why do we seek to place blame?
Placing blame is a way to avoid the responsibilities that you have toward yourself. This behavior is easier than being honest with yourself. Though deep within, you know the truth, yet you fail to accept it.
Is there more to it than avoiding our self-responsibility?
Few people are willing to accept that they are in charge of everything that is associated with their lives. Every thought, word, and action, that permeates out of your body is your responsibility. You have control over what you think, how you speak and the actions you take. To place blame is to consciously hand over this control to others or the situation. You were in charge of your motorcycle, yet you were looking for a reason to avoid your responsibility for the end result.
What about events of our distant past? These events may still impact our lives today. How does this fit into this conversation?
The healthiest way to stop blaming the events of your past, is to accept that even though you cannot change your past, you can take responsibility for your healing today. As long as you are blaming your past for your scars, the past still controls you emotionally.
The past can have some painful memories. Do we have to revisit the past to accept our responsibilities toward ourselves today?
As you continue to blame the past you add strength to the negativity of your past. When you begin to take responsibility for your healing you can refocus your energy on where you are emotionally today. The past has control over you because you give it this power through your focus. By refocusing on the positive aspects of your life now, you diminish the strength of your past.
Are there any other ways to accept our responsibilities for our healing?
The powerful act of forgiveness will help you shift your focus away from blaming others, or yourself for the events of your past. If forgiving those that harmed you is too challenging, then forgive yourself, and trust that you were doing the best you could at the time.
To move away from blame to better health, we should learn to forgive?
Forgiveness is a powerful act of self-love. Love yourself enough to free yourself from the unhealthy past through an act of self-forgiveness. Then with each new day you can begin to accept responsibility for your physical, and emotional health.
How does this conversation about forgiveness tie into my accident on my motorcycle?
Rather than search for someone, or something to blame, accept your responsibility for your situation, then forgive yourself for not accepting that responsibility sooner.
Through the powerful act of forgiveness, you can release any shame, or guilt that may be associated with a painful past. Then accept that at any time you can begin to take responsibility for your health, thereby ending the desire of placing blame on others.
I have learned that taking responsibility for my thoughts, words and actions may be a challenge, though this will be the only true way to true inner peace.
Let me know what you think. Leave a question or comment below, or email me at, firstname.lastname@example.org.
Each week I email a weekly conversation with my Inner Voice. This week we discuss how everyone is doing the best they can, all of the time. If you are interested in receiving these weekly conversations, you will find a box to subscribe lower down on this page. Or you can email me at the above address, and I’ll add you to the list.
This month I have an article titled, “Releasing Resistance” published in Conscious Shift Magazine, consciousshiftmagazine.com. In this article I discuss how, when we release resistance to life, life begins to flow easily.
I would like to wish each of you a peace filled week. The world can be a bit stressful at times so forgive yourself as often as needed.
Thank you for reading this blog post. I appreciate your support.
Peace and Well-Being.
Copyright Paul Hudon 2020