We are all born into a family. Whether we stay with that family or are raised by another, family helps shape our lives. There is much going on in a family that we could not learn elsewhere. The personal dynamics of a family are always a part of our growth, and influence the way we see and experience the world.
If we look closer we can see that our family is where we learn about being in a group, while discovering our individuality as well. Oftentimes the needs of the family may be more important than the immediate needs of the individual, this can be a challenging lesson.
When we look back at our families we can see many lessons that benefit us today, as well as the lessons our families are still teaching us. With the intention of taking a closer look at family, a conversation with my Inner Voice may add clarity. My questions will be in italics.
Families are such powerful places of learning and growth. Why is that?
Families are powerful places of learning because everyone in the family is experiencing something different than the others in the group. Yet each person in the group feels their issues are more important than the issues others are facing.
With each individual in the family there will be different reactions to different situations. No two people in the family will experience the same situation the same way. It is these different points of view that can add undo stress to the family dynamic.
Everyone who reads this post will have a different view on their family and the way they were raised. Are there any similarities between families?
The intention of most families is to create a life that will give the children the best opportunity to succeed. This is not always the case, life changes and different families will struggle with different issues. It is these issues that will shape the way the members of the family deal with the world around them.
How do the issues of a family impact the way the children view the world?
Young people learn more from the actions of their parents, than the words parents speak. Yet words are also a powerful force that influence the way people adjust to life.
When a family is struggling with money, this struggle can manifest as fear within those in the family. Any tension within the family will cause the young members to absorb this negative energy causing added stress in their lives. When the child becomes an adult, they may carry these stressors within them, thereby impacting the way they handle the similar situations.
It makes no difference if the source of tension is money, physical, or emotional health, or job security, or a lack of love from a sibling or parent, these stressors will be carried throughout life if not addressed at some point.
When we are older, living away from our family, we are still effected by what we learned as children. What are some of the ways to resolve these issues?
Know that everyone in the family was doing the best they could. Parents are doing the best they can based on how they were raised and the life experiences they went through. It can be easy to blame the other members in a family for the struggles a family has, or is facing. Placing blame does not serve the best interest of the individual, nor the family group.
There may be a belief that the parents should have known better, but they did the best they could given the knowledge they had at the time.
How do we adjust to the family dynamic as adults?
It is common for families to react to each other as they were, not as they are. If you think of another family member do you see them as they are today, or do you see them as they were? Each person in the family has grown through their life experiences. This has created the person they are today. Because of this wisdom and growth they are not the same person they were when all the family lived under one roof.
This conversation could go on for a while. Is there anything we should consider when thinking about our families?
There is a level of learning that would not happen if it were not for the learning in a family. Even though families can be challenging, this is where the individual begins to explore the world around them and the inner world within them.
Any final thoughts about family?
If you look at any family, you will see opportunities for emotional growth. Yet this will only happen when one sees the entire group as a place that has many lessons that will benefit them throughout adult life. Everyone in your family is a teacher with important lessons for your emotional growth, if you are willing to take an honest look.
Much to think about. I’m sure we will return to this subject again in the future.
Let me know what you think. Leave a comment or a question below, I’m always open to exploring the subject further.
Each week I email a conversation with my Inner Voice to those who have subscribed to my weekly. This week we discuss, mudita, what it is and how to live this way. Here is an excerpt.
What keeps us from experiencing joy at the success of others, (mudita)?
Jealousy, pride, envy, and anger to name a few. This behavior is founded in a consciousness of lack. Many people falsely believe the world has limited resources. The belief is if someone has more, or has accomplished something, then someone goes without, or fails. People who believe this are blocking their own ability to experience the best life has to offer.
If you are interested in reading this article, or receiving the weekly scroll to the bottom of the page where you will find a place to do so.
I’m excited to announce that on April 26th between 6-7:00 pm I’ll be doing a virtual reading of my book, “Your Inner Guidance, The Path to Discovering Your True Happiness” through the Salida Library. If you would like to participate in the event, head over to my website, go to events and sign up to receive the free Zoom link. I’ll send the link the week before the event.
My book, “Your Inner Guidance, The Path to Discovering Your True Happiness” is available at our local bookstores, the public libraries, Barnes & Noble as an eBook, and from Amazon as a paperback, as well as an eBook.
If you are interested in reading more about spirituality, enlightenment, and inspiration check out these two great resources. New Spirit Journal, newspiritjournalonline.com, or Conscious Shift Magazine, consciousshiftmagazine.com. I’m fortunate to write a monthly column, and have the support from these online magazines.
Thanks for being a part of this wonderful adventure called life. I hope you and those you love are healthy, and safe.
Peace and well-being,
Copyright Paul Hudon 2021