People Do Change
As I look into the night sky, it’s hard to imagine that the stars I see may not even exist. The reason for this is because they are so far way it takes years traveling at the speed of light for their light to reach Earth.
This means that what we see in the night sky is what the star was, and may not be an accurate representation of what the star is now. In other words we are seeing stars as they were in the past and not as they are today.
In a way the same is true for you and I. How often do we think of our friends as who they were when we last saw them? If we remember someone from high school, our memory may be inaccurate as to who they are now.
This would mean that people do change, even though there is a common belief that claims people don’t change. Is there any truth to this belief? We could point to any number of people and say, "See they are the same as they were", thereby justifying our false belief. The more we point to others the stronger our belief becomes. Is our judgement valid?
As I look over my life I could say I am the same person I have always been. But when I look deeper, I’m much different than I was even six years ago. Sure many aspects of who I am are the same, but others have indeed changed.
If we are convinced that people don’t change, then we will never recognize the truth of who they are. In doing so we ignore any growth they may have experienced because of the challenges they have faced.
One reason we may believe people don’t change is because we are angry with them, and our anger prevents us from seeing any emotional growth they may have experienced. In a way we want them to remain a certain way because this justifies our anger.
If they change for the better, and become healthier people, then what about our anger? What do we do then? Do we forgive them because our anger is no longer valid. In a way we are upset with an old version of who they are, which doesn’t exist anymore.
If this is the case then our anger is toward a memory of them, and not who they are in the physical world. When we think about it this way, our anger seems self-defeating, because we are holding onto a negative emotion that truly doesn’t serve our best interests.
As we look further into this idea, we realize we are not the same as we were in the past either. Life changes us through the experiences we have. If the change is positive it is because we have learned the important lessons we needed to learn at the time.
Although if we are still harboring negative thoughts and emotions, then we may not have learned what we needed to learn. When we begin to see every experience in life as lessons for our emotional growth, we may also recognize the shifts that occur within us because of these experiences.
One of the more powerful lessons of acceptance is to accept others for who they are now. This allows us the opportunity to learn something new about them, rather than hold onto an outdated image of who we think they are.
It takes courage, and forgiveness to leave an old idea behind. Courage because we have to silence our need to judge others and to take an honest look at who they are. Forgiveness because we may have to forgive ourselves for limiting our understanding of who they are as a way to satisfy our judgement.
What happens when we take the time to rearrange our thoughts to ones that see people for who they are today? We begin to experience the fullness of who they are. The growth they have experienced may be an inspiration for us to look deep within ourselves, and release our false belief that people don’t change.
Once this shift is made in our consciousness we can connect with others on a different, more positive level. Why? Because we have moved away from the negativity of judgement, to the positive, loving emotion of acceptance.
As we take the time to look into the night sky, remember, what we are seeing is how it was, and not how it is. Life is in constant change; people change as well.
Can we accept people for who they are instead of who they were?
Let me know what you think, I’m always open to exploring the subject further. Leave a message below, or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Each week I email an article to those who have subscribed to my weekly. This week I wrote about slackers. Here is an excerpt.
Why do we feel we must always be productive? Multitasking has become a way of life for many of us, but is this lifestyle healthy? No one wants to be considered a slacker so we often forgo our emotional health to avoid this stereotype. One question to ask ourselves would be, “Are we living to work, or working to live?”
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I’m excited to announce that my second book, “A Complete Life, Discovering Your Authentic Self” has been handed off to the publisher with an expected launch date of Spring 2022. I’ll keep posting updates here, and on my social media platforms as to when I have an actual release date.
If you would like to purchase a copy of my book, “Your Inner Guidance, The Path to Discovering Your True Happiness,” and you live in my area you can buy it locally at Salida Books in Salida, or The Book Nook in Buena Vista. Or reach out to me, I’ll even sign it for you.
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I’m fortunate to write a monthly column for Conscious Shift Magazine. This month you can find my article, “The Cannonball.” Do we go through life like a tsunami or a gentle wave? Click the link to read more.
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Thank you for reading this post, and being a part of this wonderful adventure called life. I appreciate your support.
Copyright Paul Hudon 2022