Saying No
What is the most powerful word in any language? In English it’s a simple two letter word, it’s power is often underrated. We all know the word, but at times are too afraid to speak it. It’s the word “No.”
Why is it we believe by saying “no” we will miss out on an opportunity? Is it because we think there are limits to the possibilities in life? Do we hesitate to say no because we don’t want to upset those around us? Yet at times, saying no can save us tremendous heartache.
The crazy thing about life is we often seek the approval of others as a way to boost our self-esteem. We want to be liked so badly we will do almost anything to please others. This includes never saying no.
We think that by saying no we are closing the door, in some cases this is true. But what if we looked at it differently? What if we accepted that by saying no to something, we are saying yes to something that could be better?
Saying no is hard, we don’t want to disappoint those around us. But let’s think about what saying yes does for us. I’m not talking about saying yes when we should say no. I’m talking about saying yes to the things that bring us true joy and happiness. The things we once ignored because we wanted the approval of others.
When I look at the night sky, I see possibilities. Each white dot holds unknown potential. This is a bit frightening as well as exciting. Saying no to others, yes to ourselves feels the same way. A little scary, but exciting. There are endless opportunities here on Earth, all we have to do is to open ourselves to saying yes to the possibilities.
It takes courage to say yes to ourselves after saying no for many years. We have to consider our own well-being, and the ramifications of saying no to those who have grown accustomed to watching us fall in line. Our fear of rejection could prevent us from moving in a direction that is true and right for us.
There have been many times in my life I wished I had said no to my friends, I would have had fewer trips to the emergency room. It was on one of these visits I realized I needed to speak up and say no.
We forget that when we say no to others, or an uncomfortable situation, we are saying yes to an alternative. Even if we can’t see the path ahead clearly, saying yes to ourselves is healthier than saying yes to a situation that is not right for us.
When we look closer at the reasons we choose to say no to things that do not align with who we are, we realize it is our self-love encouraging us to speak our truth. We love ourselves enough so we don’t need the approval of others to maintain our self-worth. We can say no and still love ourselves.
This is a place of power and strength, to say no when it doesn’t feel right, but to say yes when it does. By doing so we are in control of the way our life unfolds. No matter what choices we make, we love ourselves enough to make the right decision.
Yes there is a fine line between saying no or saying yes. It is here we have to pay attention to any intuitive feelings we may be having at the time. The trick is to determine the difference between an intuitive feeling and the feeling of fear. We can say yes to ourselves while being afraid, but our intuition will guide us through for the best possible outcome.
No might be the most powerful word ever spoken, but we have to love ourselves enough to use its strength to our benefit.
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Are we courageous enough to say “no”? Let me know what you think. Leave a question of comment below, I’m always open to hearing your point of view.
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Healing and growth happen when we are courageous enough to look at our behavior in the mirror. If we always blame something outside of ourselves, we are not taking responsibility for our actions.
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Peace and well-being, Paul
Copyright Paul Hudon 2023
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